Sunday, October 28, 2012


I've been trying for days to write a politically correct and humble post about adoption. I had references and statistics and persuasive words and then cringed because it sounded too preachy, so I watered it down until it became boring and predictable and failed to communicate what's in my heart. So this is the raw, rambling, unedited version.

I think more people should adopt. 

Specifically, I think more Christians should adopt.

People don't like to be told what they should do, especially from someone who hasn't actually done it, yet. I get that. I don't like it either, but children are dying while I try not to offend.

There are children wasting away in institutions in Bulgaria, or scrounging for food on trash heaps in The Philippines. There are kids in orphanages in Ukraine who have caregivers paid to provide them with food, but not paid enough to keep them from the abuse of an older child. Here in the United States, children in foster care are exposed to all kinds of trauma making them at high risk for suicide. There are teenaged girls aging out of orphanage life in Russia who will directly enter the sex slave trade. 
Rescue those who are unjustly sentenced to death; don't stand back and let them die.  Don't try to avoid responsibility by saying you didn't know about it. For God knows all hearts, and he sees you. He keeps watch over your soul, and he knows you knew! And he will judge all people according to what they have done.  Proverbs 24:11-12    

I've not yet parented a kid with a past, but I've read a lot and talked to enough adoptive parents to know that it's not easy.  Most orphans have some kind of special needs. For some, it's why they were abandoned. For others, it's because they were abandoned. It's difficult for kids to emerge unscathed from what they've endured. 

Give justice to the weak and the fatherless; maintain the right of the afflicted and the destitute. Rescue the weak and the needy; deliver them from the hand of the wicked. Psalm 82:3,4 

I've been told by many Christians, in essence, they couldn't handle adoption given their present circumstances.

Being the queen of "I can't handle it," I get that, as well. In fact, I've said that very thing several times during this adoption process.  We like to be in control. We like for things to make sense and to do the responsible, socially acceptable thing. 
“Something is wrong when our lives make sense to unbelievers.” -Francis Chan   
Some of us already have a lot of children and it makes zero sense to take on more. Some of us have empty nests and it would be outrageous to start over. Some of us have not yet had biological children and it would be crazy to start our families with adoption.

But when does God call us to things that make sense? To things that we can handle?

If we can handle our lives, where is God's glory in that? 

It's a myth that God doesn't give us more than we can handle. In fact, God delights in doing just that because it forces us to kneel at His need include Him in our lives. 

When we do that, He has promised that His strength is made perfect in our weakness, that He has given us all we need for life and godliness, and that He will meet all our needs according to His riches and glory in Christ Jesus.

Church, "I couldn't handle it" is not a valid reason to avoid considering adoption. 

I know, I know....not everyone is called to adopt, but aren't we all called to be willing to adopt?  It's time to have the conversation, to ask your Father, "What do you want me to do for orphans?"  
What God the Father considers to be pure and genuine religion is this: to take care of orphans and widows in their suffering and to keep oneself from being corrupted by the world. James 1:27
I was recently told that I can't change the world. True, but I can change the world for this child. How about you? Can you open your heart and your home and change the world for one?  

Disclaimer: I know there are those of you who LONG to adopt and it is not yet God's timing for you. You are helping orphans by paying forward and helping others to follow God's call to adopt. I know this because you've so generously helped us. God sees your willing heart! Don't give up. Continue to advocate, continue to give, and believe that He WILL give you the desires of your heart! And for those of you who are willing, but have not been called, thank you for helping others, for sponsoring children, for loving on the neighbor kids whose parents are always at work...for doing what He HAS called you to do!


  1. Thank you for pouring your heart out! It is so hard to have seen so many children that only need a chance, and then see Christians turn their backs and say, "Not me!" Thank you for raising your hand to God and volunteering to do His work!

  2. Beautiful post. In all things in life--whether through adoption or some other way of serving or trials or whatever, God is giving us opportunities to become like Christ. Our job is to step up to the task and accept His plan as our own. I admire and am inspired by your willingness to do His will.

  3. Sometimes God takes our willingness to obey him and turns it into something different. But it's always good. My hearts desire has been to adopt but God keeps telling me not yet. Now I am starting a non-profit organization to benefit hundreds of children who are not even available for adoption or it may be some time before they make it to their homes. There is so much work to be done. But I trust one day I'll be coming home with my own precious child!