Bo has been home almost five months. The change in him is amazing. He is no longer content to play by himself or stim in a corner. He wants to be part of the action!
We went to a family reunion a few weeks ago and stayed in the family cabins in a state park. He hated every minute of it and cried most of the time, wanting so much to go home. We knew, even then, that it was good for him to experience being away and then returning home, to better understand that home is forever, but it was hard while we were there.
The one thing he did enjoy was time at the pool. He loved it! We doubt he'd ever been swimming before, but he is a water lover without fear. Since our return, we joined the local YMCA and swimming has become a favorite activity for the family. He still loves it. In the kiddie pool, he sticks his head in the water and walks forward until he needs to breathe. I suspect he likes the quiet under the water, since it is never quiet here.
He currently attends three therapies a week, but speech will soon increase to twice weekly. (Add in speech therapy for Ben and Eon, and we are starting to feel like we live there.) He has an appointment with a highly recommended ENT the end of the month for a second opinion about his subglottic stenosis since I loathed the first doc, but specialist appointments and procedures have slowed down.
Teaching him socialization has been a priority. When he's tired or unhappy, he will clobber whoever happens to be closest. When he is finished with his dinner, his plate flies across the room unless we're quick enough to catch it. If he doesn't care for the food provided, he takes it out with his hand and flings it. He is learning that we won't allow him to gnaw on inanimate objects in public...or people either, for that matter. Keeping his hands out of his diaper is a constant battle.
Loving the big kid swing! |
The one thing he did enjoy was time at the pool. He loved it! We doubt he'd ever been swimming before, but he is a water lover without fear. Since our return, we joined the local YMCA and swimming has become a favorite activity for the family. He still loves it. In the kiddie pool, he sticks his head in the water and walks forward until he needs to breathe. I suspect he likes the quiet under the water, since it is never quiet here.
Mudding in the creek is a favorite, too! |
Teaching him socialization has been a priority. When he's tired or unhappy, he will clobber whoever happens to be closest. When he is finished with his dinner, his plate flies across the room unless we're quick enough to catch it. If he doesn't care for the food provided, he takes it out with his hand and flings it. He is learning that we won't allow him to gnaw on inanimate objects in public...or people either, for that matter. Keeping his hands out of his diaper is a constant battle.
But there is much he has already learned. Walking is his primary mode of mobility now, instead of the sideways ape scoot he used to do. He watches the other kids run out to play on the trampoline and comes and takes my hand to let him out, too. He can put his shoes on mostly independently (a skill I wish he'd teach Eon.) He can take them off, too (a skill I wish he didn't have.) He's learned to come into the kitchen and tug on my pocket to get a preview of what I'm cooking for dinner. He looks up from playing cars and, with a little smirk, comes and tickles my feet.
So many firsts! And so much that we missed those first years. So many firsts that we will never share. Or things that we assume are firsts that he may have already experienced a hundred times or more.
So many questions. What experience did he have with shoes that look like these that makes him pull his feet back and cry every time we try to put them on his adorable feet, even though he has not yet worn these?
Why is he so terrified of the stuffed alligator we found in the back of the boys' closet?
Where does he get his complete fascination with shoes (except those pictured)?
We may never know. But, at some point, we will have more shared history than not. One day, his life will be more son than orphan. Until then, we are enjoying the process.
Read the story and loved it! Lovely blog, think I will follow :)
ReplyDeleteThe last photo is priceless!
Loved reading this! The socialization paragraph cracked me up as I deal with MANY of those very same issues with Russell :)
ReplyDeleteThat last picture, precious :)
Oh, I loved the tugging on your pocket so he can see what you're making for dinner! So cute! Ally does that too!
ReplyDeleteSounds like Bo has settled in come along way. I know what you mean about all the things missed, but the past becomes further away as we keep moving forward with our precious little ones.
It is amazing to me how far Serbia has to go in their acceptance of kids with disabilities. Yes, he was in foster care, but the care wasn't all that much different than an institution. The biggest difference, I think, was the sheer number of kids. As you know, that same family had Axel for 2 years. (he was in the institution for 8 years prior to that.) They never took Axel ANYWHERE. He never left the house. He was too difficult to take anywhere. :-( I'm so glad you're getting the opportunity to see the firsts. They are wonderful, aren't they? Abel is absolutely deathly afraid to try anything new. He screams in mortal fear as if we're about to feed him to the wolves. It's sad to watch but eventually he does try new things and usually likes them!
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