A few weeks ago, I wrote a post entitled "I See Down Syndrome". It has always baffled me that other moms seem to forget about it in their children, but I never do. A few days ago, Faith's mom, Stephanie, wrote a great post entitled "Sometimes I Forget". I admit to feeling a tad jealous of her after reading it. I read it to my husband and he agreed with Stephanie.
"I hardly think about it and when I do, I'm almost surprised to realize he has Down syndrome," he said.
Really?!? What is wrong with me?
Then Shawn told me he thinks it's because of my medical background. I'm an OT. It's what I do, but it's also part of who I am. He pointed out that I've always been aware of my friends' kids' development. I'm the one who "diagnoses" kids when I work in the church nursery. I'm the one who isn't afraid to recommend early intervention to a mom when I notice her child is lagging behind. It's just what I do. I've been trained to "see" these things.
He seemed to think that it's no different from him, as a professional handyman, noticing needed house repairs when we visit someone. (Hmmmm. That doesn't seem to translate to our own house...;)
I think he's on to something! After starting to question my acceptance of Ds and even Eon himself, I am breathing a deep sigh of relief. Maybe I'm not as warped as I thought!
I am the same way, and I'm not an OT :) Maybe because Lily is only 6 months old and I'm still processing everything? Maybe because I have ten kids, so I notice a lot of differences? I don't know, but at this point I don't think a day goes by that I don't think about Lily having ds. Not in a negative way, just knowing it's there. Mainly because I'm ALWAYS- and I do mean always- looking for ways to help her. Whether that's through therapy, or talking to other moms, reading other blogs, or just praying for her- I'm obsessed with giving her the best life we possibly can!! It sounds like that's what you're doing too. Glad we're normal:)
ReplyDeleteYou're totally not warped at all Tara...I think your husband IS on to something! That all said, the love you have for Eon shines through!
ReplyDeleteYou are not warped! Just human :) I see it too, but that isn't a bad thing. It's just a thing.
ReplyDeleteTara, that's the first pic I've seen of Eon...wow! is he EVER a.d.o.r.a.b.l.e. Hubby's right...my mom was a nurse and she was always "seeing" and "diagnosing" me! More often than not she was right, but she did go over the top in worrying about those "possible" problems. ;) So now I say, I'm not a nurse, I just grew up with one!
ReplyDeleteblessings,
Tonya...hope to see you in WR this year;)
When you posted the blog entry that you are referring to, I totally agreed with you. I think that my daughter's Ds is part of what makes her incredible and I'd never take it from her. Despite this, I recently had a moment just like the one Stephanie describe, when a stranger approached me about my bear cub's diagnosis, and I was surprised to internally think, 'Oh yeah, she does have Ds'. It was the first time I was surprised, but I think part of it was that I was distracted by my other daughter and hadn't had a stranger approach me or notice the Ds before, so I was partially surprised because it was novel for me. I did feel like I always notice it, but I guess I don't.
ReplyDeleteHmmm, I don't usually see it either. Thats not to say that everyday I don't think about Ds. I do, I'm always reading blogs or on babycenter, but when I'm with Claire, that's not what I think of first.
ReplyDeleteI agree. I don't think about it as much, but the DS is sort of a lens I see my daughter through. I see so much more beyond that, but it remains present to me. I'm a child/family psychologist and, like you said, I think that training for a "developmental eye" helps and hurts at times. You're an inspirational mama, and I appreciate you being so real!
ReplyDeleteI still see the Ds but now I see PAST it.
ReplyDeleteGood posts. SO good to see you and type again! Were home!!!
ReplyDeleteMy husband doesn't see it as much either. I think it's because he's not around other kids and because he isn't the active parent here. It's not that he's not involved, he is, it's just that other than doing her oral-motor exercises he isn't really involved in her therapies. I "see" it all the time, but this is probably because as Patti said "I'm ALWAYS- and I do mean always- looking for ways to help her. Whether that's through therapy, or talking to other moms, reading other blogs, or just praying for her- I'm obsessed with giving her the best life we possibly can!! "
ReplyDeleteI could have written that! So true!!